Setiap anak perlu pendekatan yang berbeda-beda, karena mereka memiliki karakter yang unik, berbeda satu dengan yang lainnya.
Membaca artikel dari The Jakarta Post, membuat saya berkesimpulan, masih banyak yang perlu dipelajari sebagai orangtua. Oh ya, Bu Enny Edratna pernah juga membuat tulisan dengan tema yang nyaris sama, dengan artikel di koran harian berbahasa Inggris itu.
Ini link artikel Bu Enny : Percakapan Ringan
Nury Vittachi, Bangkok | Sun, 01/30/2011 3:33 PM | Opinion
Asian kid living in London enters home. His school friends shout: “Happy birthday! Surprise!” The kid continues on his way to his room, saying: “I have homework. Enjoy the party. I may join you later.”
That’s a true story. That kid was me. I wasn’t being obnoxious. Asian kids are rigidly conditioned to a) study; b) have bad haircuts; c) like maths; and d) eat foods that other kids find disgusting like dried squid or sliced, char-grilled dissident. My upbringing did me no harm at all, except to turn me into the drooling, unstable, gun-polishing, stairwell-lurker that I am today.
These days I live in Asia and half the moms I know are Tiger Moms (a term popularized by US monster-mom Amy Chua), while others take a kinder, gentler stance. Let’s compare them.
1) What do you ask when you meet your child’s teacher?
Nice Mom: “Is my daughter happy?”
Tiger Mom: “Is my daughter top of the class?”
2) What do you say when your child brings home a finger-painting ?
Nice Mom: “Lovely! This blob looks like a cloud and this one looks like a rabbit.”
Tiger Mom: “Eww! Horrible! This looks like a child painted it.”
Nice Mom to teacher: “She loves art. Can you cultivate those skills?”
Tiger Mom to teacher: “She loves art. Can you beat that out of her? Here’s a stick.”
3) What guidance do you give the child about life?
Nice Mom: “Eat your vegetables and grow up big and strong.”
Tiger Mom: “You must try try try to succeed. Even then you’ll probably fail. Life is hard.”
4) How do you handle work-life balance?
Nice Mom: “After your homework, we’ll go to the playground.”
Tiger Mom: “Work work work. Even then you probably fail. Life is HARD.”
5) How do you help her chose a career?
Nice Mom: “So, sweetheart, do you still want to be a dancer or a singer or a princess?”
Tiger Mom: “You can choose from this list: doctor, medical practitioner, surgeon or physician.”
Nice Mom: “What’s important is to do what you love.”
Tiger Mom: “You gotta earn a lot of money so you can look after me when I’m old. Life is hard.”
6) How would you help your child learn a poem?
Nice Mom: “Let’s make up a funny limerick.”
Tiger Mom: “If you have to memorize something, here’s the Periodic Table.”
7) What do you say to her father?
Nice Mom: “Good news, she’s making friends.”
Tiger Mom: “Bad news, she’s making friends.”
8) What do you say at the parent-teacher conference?
Nice Mom: “We want her gently stretched without being intimidated.”
Tiger Mom: “Can you guarantee she’ll get straight As? Before you answer, I want you to know that I have a gun and it’s loaded.”
Which do I recommend? Neither. I’m a guy. Men play no part in this decision. Amy Chua lives in the west with a Caucasian husband but her kids are raised Asian-style. Your humble narrator lives in Asia with a Caucasian wife, but our kids are raised Western-style.
You see, moms may come in two flavors. But female spouses only come in one flavor: tiger wives. When it comes to family decisions, women rule.